Energy and Emotions

With it being the anniversary of a life changing experience for our whole family I wanted to share the value in how unforeseen situations in our life can actually be a turning point to gain greater understanding of your journey and the path you are travelling.

It is something some know, some acknowledge, some choose to ignore while others are still discovering. The way we react or respond to any situation is based on past experiences, whether it be personally or through your upbringing which is why today I will share some of my learning’s and knowledge, which I gained through the journey we have taken with our son being diagnosed with Autism…

I will remind the clock a little first. Prior to children I was the kind of person that liked to be busy and would run on little sleep and the excitement of life… This did not change much even when we had our first daughter, although I did discover that lack of sleep can be a challenge at times… It was not until our son with Autism arrived in this world and was not a sleeper that my world started to really change along with my mindset… Yes, I knew needing sleep was of huge value, but with the amount I was getting it got to the stage that I felt sleep was a fallacy and just a bonus if I got some…

I learnt to run on adrenalin and in overdrive.  Not realising the long term impact it was having along with many other issues we were facing with our son I just kept going… This all led to me developing coping mechanisms that were not ideal but it was the only way I felt I could survive each day without sleep and a demanding child… My energy levels were low, and in my mind I had to keep going, which meant my emotions were often suppressed and pushed aside as I did not have time to deal with these as there was more important things that took priority…

With significant events our world changed course on many occasions. One being, when our son fell from a hotel window. With so many emotions coming to the surface, this made me realise, that we can’t put everything on hold because of what may happen as you never know what tomorrow may bring and opportunities may be lost if we do not embrace them. This led to us less than 12 months later welcoming our second son and third child into the world and what a change this was… Nothing prepared me for the energy and emotions I needed to deal with two boys that did not sleep properly.

We often had tag going between the boys and this Mumma was of the mindset that even though I was in survival mode and feeling exhausted that I still had to keep going, no matter what others said. Yes, there were times I did get a break but this was not enough for my mind and body to rejuvenate.  When you are the one maintaining the home life with a shift working husband that still struggled to cope with our sons diagnosis I felt I had no choice but to keep going, as that’s what I had always done and how I dealt with stress…

So where did the turning point happen?

To be honest I am not 100% sure but I do know what played a significant part in me having to change the ways I did things, that was when all came undone with our sons schooling. He was not coping and they did not understand that if things were changed that he would cope better. We went from a happy boy to meltdowns at school that led to daily meltdowns at home and refusal to get out of the car to attend school… The impact it was having was not ideal for anyone and we had to make choices that we had never thought we would have to do – which was to change school… With this change it was a realisation that I needed to change my ways too. Investing time in our son and not investing time in me was having huge impact on me mentally, physically and emotionally, in ways that I did not always see…

The move forward meant I was now on a journey to a world where I began to see that the emotions I was not dealing with were in fact impacting my energy… Yes, exhaustion and fatigue, something we have all experienced comes from stress, struggle, fighting to achieve results or outcomes, pushing beyond your limits, frustration and ultimately the drain that goes with being over-committed with so many things to do with our children. After all it has become our new way of living without us realising…

Then with this we add maintaining a house and nurturing other members in our family… So who becomes last, us of course… The issue is, this is only the beginning of what is to come as when we do not align our emotions and energy it does catch up with us and this is when we begin to be impacted by other physical disorders and ailments as our body tries to slow us down to understand what is happening and slowly if we are not careful we become consumed by it all struggling to find a way out…

It was not just about changing my drinking and eating habits to make a difference, it showed me there was more to our lives and how what I was doing was not just impacting me, but those around me without realising. Emotions are real and suppressing them is not ideal as what we resists persists until we start to listen. These emotions may be from our past and they will appear in the present and if we do not deal with them, they will impact on our future if you don’t start acknowledging them sooner than later.

I soon learnt, all that was happening in my world was linked to my past, present and future and I could not continue on the path I was travelling as it was damaging for me and those that surrounded me. I needed to slow down and listen to my body. I needed to nurture me as the frequent chiropractor appointments, headaches, lower back pain, stress and drain on my brain, with thoughts that were consumed by our son every waking moment was of no value to me or my family.

I needed to be living on this journey not existing. I needed to listen to my body and take time for me as fatigue was a way of saying you need to stop and process what is happening in your world whether it be personally, professionally or related to family… It was time to nurture me… As I freed space in my mind, doors began to open and the more knowledge I was to gain, the more I began to understand this journey we are travelling…

I began to see that on those days that I have no Zippity as a sign for me to slow down and process what is happening. Rather than pushing through and fighting the way I was feeling, it was a sign that the ‘do’ in my dah day was to take time to nurture me, reflect and discover what I needed to do to move forward to allow my body to cope at this point in time. This may vary each time, but I have learnt that the progress I make by doing this has more value than I ever realised when it comes to connecting with our son, which I will share with you another time…

For now what I would love to do is let you know that you are not alone on this journey and if you resonate with just one thing I have shared then I would love to have a conversation with you to chat about how I may be able to assist you to transform your journey…

Simply contact me via our awesome #LLOTS Facebook Community.