When it all gets too hard…

This article comes to you today with a heavy heart and the need to share something that has so much value at a time like this when a families lives have been taken too soon for reasons we will never understand…

This is not about what is right or wrong.  From where I am sitting no one knows what was really going on in that families life for this to happen… What it shows us is that there needs to be more compassion, love and encouragement for all of these families. There needs to be a greater understanding of how a situation like this impacts the family as a whole and how often it does all become too much when there is not always the right supports in place to assist each family…

For some I know it’s hard to fathom and others I know if they were honest they have questioned why they were chosen to take this path with their child… The services available and what we access varies globally, but as a parent that has been on this journey for some time and seen many other families struggling for various reasons I have to be honest and say this along with having a movement of over 6,000 members there is some very common characteristics that appear daily…

These families feel isolated, overwhelmed, are grieving, alone and not understood. The connections with family, friends and the community have changed and they often don’t know what is best for themselves, children or family as a whole. They don’t know who to ask for help in some cases and others they don’t want to burden someone else with their issues.

Their time is consumed with maintaining balance and calmness where possible in a house that is often walking on egg shells in fear that something may go wrong and the child with Autism will have a meltdown and when I say meltdown I am not talking about a two year old tantrum I am talking about children that even in their teens are still crumbling with frustration which may lead to lashing out, destroying furniture in their homes and bedrooms and causing stress for all concerned in the household. Life has become consumed by this child who has presented with so many challenges leaving you with a life that you could never had planned for… A life that you only what the best for your child but you have no idea how to provided this…

Hobbies and outings have become a thing of the past as there are too many unknown factors when leaving the house, let alone within the house that are not predictable.… Sleep for many of these families is a fallacy as children with Autism often don’t have the greatest sleeping habits and it can take years to master what is best for your child…Holidays may happen but like outings it is not easy and needs to be planned for with great depth to ensure that all bases are covered where possible to ensure a reasonable time is had by all… In saying that it often is not much of a holiday due to the stress that is often involved for your child with Autism…

Life is filled with structure and routine as anything different will create absolute chaos and then your day will be written off with a child that is not coping… A lot of the hopes and dreams you had or have for your neurotypical children changes with these children as you realise how valuable the smallest achievement is with ASD children from sleeping through, to reducing meltdowns, to establishing communication with non-verbal children to being able to go out without it ending in a complete meltdown… Life purely is not what you planned it to be and will never be that way either as the outcome for these children is going to to be unique to each one of these children…

So, what does this mean for many of these families…

It means that no matter whether they come from diverse backgrounds, separated families, abusive relationships, traumatic upbringing, a partner that’s in denial, a sole parent, blended families, a happy marriage we all come together as parents with a common interest, which is Fear of our child/rens future.  We fear failure in everything we do as we can’t take any more bad news.  We fear the change that is needed to achieve what we need to.  We fear what others may say about the decisions we make and our childs behaviours. We fear making the wrong choices and ultimately we Fear success as this is something we are no longer used to. No matter what your situation may be or where you are located I want you to know that the situation can be changed globally.  Together we can make a difference, starting today…

There needs to be more focus on the parenting role and supports they need from the beginning as a prevention, as what many do not see is that when the parents nurture themselves they can better nurture their children as well… They open the doors to discover new things and they begin to see value in obstacles and how they can turn them into opportunities. They start to float rather than sinking and move beyond the darkness that they are filled with from within.

It’s a journey that is not for the faint hearted as you will need persistence, endurance, strength, will power, commitment and patience and as everyone’s level of coping is so very different the level that each person can manage will vary as well, which is why I developed this amazing movement which consists of over 6,000 members. It is a place where everyone is able to gain value through the knowledge, experiences and inspiration that is shared on a daily basis. Its a place where those that feel alone can be connected. Those that are struggling can gain guidance. Those that want to learn more can do so and those that wish to share their success they can do this… It is a place that they love to be part of and if this is something you would like to be part of too then I would love to invite you to join us in being a part this amazing movement which has a positive environment with a passion for Autism :-)

Autism Living Life On The Spectrum

If you are a parent of a child with Autism and have been impacted by this event
I would like to offer two free coaching sessions
for the first 10 people who message me via Facebook…

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