What it’s like to be a Mum of a child with Autism ?

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Over ten years ago I wrote a piece which explained what is was like at the start of our journey which you can read by following this link to Ethyns Story

Since then a lot has changed and I will share some of this with you today…

First and foremost I am me, I am a wife and a mother of three beautiful children, one which has Autism… Having so many roles can become very interesting when there is only one of me that needs to be split into a minimum of 5 ways on the average day… Yes, that is right, as I need time for me, my husband, each of my children and time as a family and that does not account for all the extra titles I carry when tending to our ASD son. It is a juggling act, it is stressful, it is demanding but at the end of the day it is also so very rewarding…

When I reflect on the past ten years and see how far we have come I am so very proud of my whole family for embracing this journey we are taking.  Through the hard times, the tough times, the sad times and most of all the happy times.  We have all shared these moments and become a stronger unit for doing so.  What happens in our house I know affects us all in different ways so I have endeavoured to ensure I best meet each persons needs in situations as they arise… No it hasn’t been easy, and sometimes you won’t get it right but that is okay as we are human.  What is important is knowing that if you keep working on it, you will achieve plenty by trusting your intuition.

Our son with ASD has taken the priority position, but now we are seeing more freedom coming from the work we have put in… In reality a lot of what he does is not much different than most teenagers which we sometimes forget… To look at him all we see is one very handsome young man that is growing way too quick for my liking.  By the way I say young man as at 13 years of age he is already 6ft and still growing.

It’s often about acknowledging that you can’t control every situation that arises and to gain the freedom we are often seeking, we need to let go of the desire to control everything from an ego level. You will be amazed at how things begin to unfold and doors start to open when we stop feeding the ego and nurture our intuition as this is where the path to freedom within our journey exists.

I love that I no longer live the life, that overdrive was the only way to survive. With every day spent chasing after a boy who did not know when to stop and would just go flat out until he dropped…. It was utter exhaustion and now I get the honour of looking back knowing we have turned so many obstacles into opportunities… No doubt there will be more but I have learnt that by focusing on what we are doing today is what creates our sons future.  It’s no point worrying about what lies ahead as it will be here soon enough.  It’s about learning the value of living in the now and being able to celebrate the success we create and seeing our failures as obstacles waiting to be turned into opportunities :-)

It’s about understanding that our son has as much potential as anyone.  He may still be developing his speech (still referred to as non-verbal) but can very clearly demonstrate his needs when he wants to… He has the greatest sense of humour and when he really laughs and I mean with tears rolling down his cheeks it is beautiful to hear.  He shows affection differently to his siblings but it is one of our many achievements as I made sure our son knew how to give cuddles and say I love you as these are such nurturing values for any parent and child…

One of my greatest gains for me is being shown how to see life from a very unique perspective which I thank our son for often.  There is so many things we take for granted or would never of had to overcome if we did not travel this path.  It has help create the person I have become today and is what drives my passion each day… In amongst the obstacles there has been so many opportunities discovered and I know there are still more to come on this amazing journey with our son…